Maybe the simplest, biggest resolution you make this year


Here is a hard reality: you have the same number of minutes in each day as Shakespeare did. Our minutes are filled with lots of important things, like caring for those we love, contributing to our community, working to build something larger than ourselves. At the same time, almost all of us feel as though a portion of our moments just slip away. We look back at the end of a day, week, or decade and say ‘Where did the time go?’ [My pre-child answer is cute cat videos, Wikipedia rabbit holes, and finding the perfect cocktail recipe.]

It’s the time of resolutions and review, we look back over the past year and look forward to the great blank page of tomorrow. Maybe 2018 will be the year that we hold more of those moments close. The year we spend our moments preciously. Before our calendars are full of winter weekends and spring commitments, here’s just one simple suggestion for reminding yourself of who’s in control of those numbered minutes (hint: you).

Change the way you talk about your choices: Try replacing ‘I don’t have time for ….’ (2017 talk) with ‘I don’t value….’ or ‘…. is not a priority for me.’ (2018 talk)

This is a tough, simple way to check your behavioral choices against your values. When I replace “I don’t have time for personalizing the holiday cards’ with ‘Personalizing the holiday cards just isn’t a priority for me right now’ – well that’s TRUE, kinda stinks but realistically, laundry and story time are way bigger priorities. Done and done.

When I replace “I don’t have time to exercise/meditate/floss/pray/express gratitude every day” with “I don’t value daily exercise/meditating/flossing/praying/expressing gratitude” ….erg, that one doesn’t sit right. I do value those things… and if I’m not doing it, that means something else that I value less needs to come off the daily list (hmmm, maybe Facebook?).

If you need a supporting quote with more street cred: Mahatma Gandhi said “Your beliefs become your thoughts, your thoughts become your words, your words become your actions, your actions become your habits, your habits become your values, your values become your destiny.

If you want to change your destiny, your values, your habits, your actions – choose one link in the chain and change it. See how the rest cascades toward a new future. Wishing you peace and joy in the new year. – Dr. Kerry

P.S. A bonus for all the Hamilton fans in the audience: I spent most of December singing my own redo of Aaron Burr’s advice to ‘Talk less, smile more’. I sang “Do less, breathe more” driving to Target at rush hour, sweating over gluten free vegan gingerbread recipes, or prepping for a holiday party that was way cooler than I was. May we all do less and breathe more this year.